Living Buoyantly to Honor Connor
Connor Gage was just 15 when he passed away. His death on August 31, 2012, was a tragedy that his mother Dana Gage says could have been prevented.
“Within five hours, my life went from normal to tragedy. And my story does not have to be anyone else’s. I don’t want it to be.”
The LV Project is Dana’s nonprofit mission to buoyantly lift others. It’s a story that goes far beyond the traditional organizational tasks of raising awareness and speaking at local Rotary Clubs. Dana hopes that her vision of helping individuals rise from their valleys and climb to their peaks in North Texas is just the beginning. She has big goals in mind to honor her late son Connor.
Dana and her husband Brett were frequent visitors to Eagle Mountain Lake, located in Tarrant and Wise counties, where the Gage family owned a lake house for several years.
“We required our two sons to get certified in various water related safety courses and they were not allowed into the water without a life jacket and a supervising adult present.”
That day Connor went to a birthday party with four friends and a host family. “It was the first and only time we had allowed him to go to the lake with another family,” Dana said.
“At our lake place, we had a ‘toe in, vest on’ policy. If your toe was in the water, your vest had to be on. I thought everyone followed those rules, especially with teenagers. I couldn’t have been more wrong. And it’s changed my life forever.”
That night, the boys got permission to swim. Connor jumped from the roof of the boat dock, landed badly and didn’t resurface. The adults in charge had not required the boys to wear life jackets. Connor had to be retrieved by a dive team 45 minutes later.
“It just took one bad jump, one bad fall, and it was over,” Dana said. “We’ve since learned how common teenage drownings are in this country. A life jacket in a lake is like a seatbelt in a car… there when you need it. Being a good swimmer simply isn’t enough.”
Unfortunately, when Connor died, he was a normal, healthy teenager, an athlete, and an experienced lake kid who had spent countless hours on the lake. But unlike all the other days he’d spent on the water, this time, life jackets were not required. Connor wasn’t wearing one when he took that fateful jump.
As Dana points out, “Lakes are very different than pools… murky, deep, unpredictable. And without a life jacket, you’re likely looking at a recovery situation, not a rescue.”
“I know, I know…” Dana pauses briefly. “People don’t want to talk about why life jackets are much more important at lakes. They think that it’s silly for a teenager, or even an adult to be wearing a life jacket
at a lake. Especially if they know how to swim.”
But accidents do happen.
According to the Center for Disease Control, Texas has the third highest rates in the United States for drowning, and 42 percent of these fatalities are what is referred to as a natural water-related deaths, meaning they occurred in creeks, lakes, rivers, streams, and other natural bodies of water. Males are three times more likely to die in natural waters in Texas, as opposed to females, and over 90 percent of these males are over the age of 15.
“It’s not just about whether somebody can swim. With lakes, there’s a lot more to factor in. Like currents, depth of the water, time of day, weather, and more.”
Lake Lewisville is known as the deadliest lake in Texas. It accounts for just over 233 miles of shoreline and roughly 29,000 acres. All but one fatality in Lake Lewisville were male and not wearing a life jacket at the time of their death.
“I believe that there’s a perception problem,” Dana explains. “And what I mean by that is that people often think that a good swimmer, a certified scuba diver, or even a Crossfit athlete can’t drown. Unfortunately, that too happened last year at the Crossfit Games in Fort Worth, and what I discovered when Connor passed away is that there’s what I call an X-Effect that exists. There’s an overlap that occurs when kids reach age fifteen. The risk of death triples when a natural body of water is present.”
Dana refuses to let Connor’s death at Possum Kingdom Lake in Palo Pinto County become just another statistic.
“The area where Connor died was over twenty feet deep, and all it took was one playful jump… ” Dana said with a pause as she fights to keep her emotions in check. It’s been over a decade now. Time won’t erase his memory, or how much she loves her son.
Instead, it’s even more important now for her to honor him.
“We started The LV Project initially to honor Connor. But our mission isn’t just ours anymore. I feel like this is Connor’s mission too. He would want us to continue to live our lives buoyantly. Just like he did,” Dana said after gathering herself. The word Dana explains holds so much meaning to her because for years it was hard for her to just tell Connor’s story without crumbling.
Connor’s story has also lived buoyantly in other ways.
The LV Project also provides grief getaways for families that have experienced child loss. The loss of a child is extremely difficult, and for some, the ability to just get away has proven to be helpful in terms of grief management.
“The need to reset and refuel after loss is critical to the recovery process. An individual did this for us, and this is our way of helping other families that have gone through child loss. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been, we’re here to help,”
Dana shares.
“There’s a quote by Desmond Tutu that I like to say when it comes to my son’s story. And that quote is, ‘there comes a point where we need to stop pulling people out of the river. Instead, we need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in,’” Dana said in response to the growing problem related to drowning-related fatalities in natural waters.
“I believe that we can minimize the number of fatalities in drowning-related accidents. I would love to come up with a solution beyond just encouraging life jackets. Maybe something that inflates when an individual becomes unconscious and lifts them to the surface.
“If my son had one, I believe, without question, that he would still be here today. I’m open to chatting with any company that could bring my vision to life. But until I figure that out, I’m doing everything in my power to bring awareness in every
way possible.”
Dana’s voice becomes more uplifting as she discusses her visions to continue to honor her late son. “We also have an event, too. This is the Honor Connor 5K and Smile Mile. We buoyantly celebrate the life of Connor Kelly Gage with this run as it winds its way around North Richland Hills.”
The run benefits The LV Project, and is May 17. Check out HonorConnorRun.com, and follow The LV Project at LVProject.org.
